The Revolution Should be Televised

For the second time this year, the political parties that run this country have entertained us with the sound bite- "Shutdown Showdown." They have come out of negotiations with two very different reports on progress. I guess they would rather discuss the NFL lockout; instead of doing their jobs. We have the Left reporting that they have agreed with a number to trim from the budget, and we have the Right reporting that they haven't agreed to anything. They want a specific amount cut and they would rather shutdown the entire system than to compromise. Does the Right view the Left as terrorists; and have dutifully instituted the, "This Nation Does Not Negotiate With Terrorists Act of 2012." The only problem with this is, they are colleagues that are supposed to share the same goal of running this country in the best interest its citizens.

So I offer a simple solution, televise the proceedings. Let us see what each side wants to cut, and why. Let us hear the Right argue how those with the most deserve more. Let the Left counter with economic growth, job creation and the ability to win the future are not up for the chopping block.

If the proceedings were indeed televised, this is how I imagine it going (closed caption provided by my keyboard).

Right: If we allow this administration to create jobs, it will undermine our 2012 bid for the White House.

Left: Unemployment is at an all-time high, and job creation is what everyone in this room ran on.

Right: And we will create jobs, starting on January 21, 2013- just in time to save us for the mid-term elections. Nothing personal, just politics.

Left: But it was you all that put the country in this predicament to begin with.

Right: The past is the past and we've change; we understand what is important, and just as our pledge stated, "We will continue to do what we've always done."

Left: Okay, you win. Can we break out the Wii now?

(Final six hours of the proceedings go to blue screen)

Both sides emerge from the proceeding looking tired, (mainly from the physical exertion of playing Wii) and the Dems seem very satisfied. The Republicans look beaten, yet victorious.

This is what they report:

Donkeys (because this is where they make an ass of themselves): Compromises were made in the name of Bi-partisan ship (meaning we switched up teams in our Wii playing after we proved to be the dominant party) and everyone had the opportunity to express themselves in this compromise.

Pachyderms  (so named because they never forget how good those good olde times were): We didn't get everything we wanted (they lost at Wii), but we are satisfied with the cuts that were made. We got to mix it up a little bit with the asses over there and I must admit, they were just as serious as we are about keeping the government running (Wii track and field).

Tea Leaves: These proceedings were business as usual in Washington.